Post By Danny: The Disintegration of the Family

Introduction

                Everyone that has read “The Family: A Proclamation to the World”, knows about the strong language used by the leaders of the church when speaking of the disintegration of the family.  The sentence reads as follows, “Further, we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets” (¶ 8).  What many people may not know is what exactly those calamities are, and that certain such calamities have already begun to surface. This article will attempt to identify: what those calamities are, how they are beginning to affect us, and what we can do to safeguard our families personally.

What Calamities?

            The calamities foretold by ancient prophets go clear back to Old Testament times, are steadily found throughout all scripture, and continue through modern prophets today.

            In Isaiah 24 we read the following statements,

1.      “The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled” (vs. 3)

a.       How might this happen?  D&C 29:16 reads, “And there shall be a great hailstorm sent forth to destroy the crops of the earth”.

2.      “Therefore hath the curse devoured the earth, and they that dwell therein are desolate” (vs. 6)

a.       What could such a curse be? D&C 29:18-19 reads, “I the Lord God will send forth flies upon the face of the earth, which shall take hold of the inhabitants thereof, and shall eat their flesh, and shall cause maggots to come in upon them…and their flesh shall fall off their bones, and their eyes from their sockets”.

3.      “The earth shall reel to and fro like a drunkard” (vs. 20)

a.       What does this actually mean? D&C 45:33 reads, “And there shall be earthquakes also in diverse places”.

b.      When the Savior was crucified in Jerusalem, we read that, “the veil of the temple was rent in twain…and the earth did quake, and the rocks rent” (Matthew 27:51).  In the Americas, “the face of the whole earth became deformed, because of the tempests, and thundering, and lightnings, and the quaking of the earth” ( 3 Nephi 8:17).  How will the earth react when everything that the Savior stood for is crucified by the people as well? 

In Doctrine and Covenants 45:26 we read that, “in that day shall be heard of wars, and rumors of wars, and the whole earth shall be in commotion, and men’s hearts shall fail them”.  How could the disintegration of the family bring about calamities such as these? 

1.      Divorce- Divorce often leads to feelings of depression, self doubt, and uncertainty among adults and children alike.  (men’s hearts shall fail them)

2.      Low rates of fertility- China, the most populated country on earth, has a one child policy that has resulted in many more males being born than females. “Imbalanced sex ratios have also been noted in other countries, most notably South Korea and India” (Liu & Zhang, 2009).  The problem with so many men is there is a “historical correlation between nations having excess men and being more warlike” (Hudson & den Boer, 2004). (wars and rumors of wars)

3.      Abortion- This is linked to low fertility rates and feelings of depression among mothers and fathers.  Moreover, it is considered a serious sin before the Lord, and has itself been the cause of much commotion in the land. (eg. Political disputes, attacks on abortion centers, etc.)

Lastly, I would like to mention D&C 5:19.  This scripture reads,

For a desolating scourge shall go forth among the inhabitants of the earth, and shall continue to be poured out from time to time, if they repent not, until the earth is empty, and the inhabitants thereof are consumed away and utterly destroyed by the brightness of my coming.

This scripture is not clear as to what this desolating scourge or sickness might be. There are many possible answers, but I will focus on one.

1.      Sexually Transmitted Diseases- Certainly STD’s have been poured out upon the inhabitants of the earth and have destroyed many lives.  This could so easily be avoided if men and women were abstinent before marriage and faithful to their spouse afterward.  STD’s are especially prominent among gay couples, who generally have many partners a year.  Breaking the law of chastity, infidelity to ones partner, and engaging in homosexual activities are all sinful acts that harm the institution of the family and have potential deleterious effects for those involved.

What can we do to avoid these calamities?

            I will not dwell long on this subject because of the simplicity of the answer: read, study, pray about, and live the Proclamation.  Remember that you are a child of heavenly parents, along with everyone else around you. Keep the law of chastity before and after marriage.  Honor your marital vows with complete fidelity.  Love and nurture your children.  Teach them the gospel.  Always remember that, “Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities” (¶ 7). 

Conclusion

As we can see, the disintegration of the family really can have severely negative effects on individuals, communities, and nations.  Nothing can ensure a perfect family, but following the principles found in the Proclamation can ensure that we will be in good standing with the Lord, and if we live as we are taught, we can have the hope to avoid at least some of the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets in our personal families.

References:

Hudson, V.M., & den Boer, A.M. (2004). Bare branches: The security implications of Asia’s surplus male population. Cambridge, MA: MIT Press.

Liu, T., & Zhang, X. (2009). Ratio of males to females in China. British Medical Journal, 338(b483), 899-900.

Post By Ragan: Child Abuse and Neglect

A child. A small, innocent child of God. Something that people usually cherish and love unconditionally, as they should. However, some people do not understand that sacredness that lies within these little ones.  They do not know how to care for children.  The children end up being abused and neglected and it must stop.

Children are a wonderful gift in our lives and should not have to suffer from abuse and neglect.  The consequences can be severe and their lives will be changed by such behavior of their parents.

In the scriptures is read, "know ye not that your body is a temple of the Holy Ghost...?" (1 Corinthians 6:19). Just as our bodies are sacred and important, so are our children's.  Abusing them and harming their bodies, minds, and spirits is contrary to everything that the Lord has told us to do.  We must raise our children with love and in righteousness.  Leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints have defined abuse. "Abuse is the physical, emotional, sexual, or spiritual mistreatment of others.  It may not only harm the body, but it can deeply affect the mind and spirit, destroying faith and causing confusion, doubt, mistrust, guilt, and fear" (1995, p. 1).  Why anyone would want to do these things to a child, I have no idea. But it does happen.  “Little children are innocent and precious in the eyes of God. Jesus Christ experienced some of His most tender moments with children and reserved His strongest language for those who abuse them. ‘Whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea’ (Matthew 18:6)” (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, 2005).  The welfare of a child is not something a parent should tamper with.

This mistreatment of children is followed by many damaging consequences.  According to the Child Welfare Information Gateway (2008), they may suffer from physical health consequences, psychological consequences, and/or behavioral consequences.

Physical health consequences:
While the physical consequences can be minimal and short term such as bruises, scratches and even broken bones, they can also be long term and very damaging.  A small baby could suffer from shaken baby syndrome and die.  A child may also suffer from brain damage linked to being abused and causing the brain to not develop correctly.  Poor physical health could also be a result of child abuse and neglect; there could be problems with “allergies, arthritis, asthma, bronchitis, high blood pressure, and ulcers" (Child Welfare Information Gateway, 2008).

Psychological consequences:
“The immediate emotional effects of abuse and neglect—isolation, fear, and an inability to trust—can translate into lifelong consequences, including low self-esteem, depression, and relationship difficulties" (Child Welfare Information Gateway, 2008).  They may also suffer from poor emotional and mental health and have issues such as panic disorder, dissociative disorders, attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder, anger, post traumatic stress disorder, and reactive attachment disorder.  Abused children usually do not excel in school and have difficulty with cognitive development.

Behavioral consequences:
Abused children are more likely to suffer from delinquency and criminality later in life and have drug and alcohol abuse.  It is not uncommon for someone who was abused to also become abusive themselves later in life.  If that’s all that you were raised with, then it tends to roll over into your own family.

Children are so sweet. They are loved by the Lord and should be loved by their parents.  They should be cared for and their needs should always be met.  They trust their parents to be there and will do almost anything to please their parents.  Do not let them down.  Do not forget who they are and who they will become.

Sources:

Child Welfare Information Gateway. (2008). Long-Term Consequences of Child Abuse and Neglect. Child Welfare Information Gateway. Retrieved from http://www.childwelfare.gov/

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. (2005, November 21). The Evil of Child Abuse. Newsroom. Retrieved from http://www.mormonnewsroom.org/

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. (1995). Responding to Abuse: Help for Ecclesiastic Leaders, 1. Retrieved from http://www.providentliving.org/

 

Post By Ragan: Work and Family Conflicts

I grew up in a home where my mother stayed home all day.  She cooked, she cleaned, she was always there for us.  I always had her there when I came home from school, the house always was nice and tidy, and dinner was always a home cooked meal.  However, times have changed and she now is a working mom. I still have an eleven year old sister at home who has not had the luxury of having a mom there to greet her every day when she gets home.  I know that this has affected her.  Although our family may need my mom to work and help provide for us financially, it still is important to realize that a mother's kids always needs their love and attention.

While many families have a need for both parents to work, it's essential for them to realize that a child always does best with a mother to stay home and take care of them.  A home with a working mother will have more negative outcomes than a home with a mother who is always there.

President Gordon B. Hinckley (1996) of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints once said, "It is well-nigh impossible to be a full-time homemaker and a full-time employee" (p. 69).  There is no easy way to be a mom and hold a job at the same time.  People may have to make sacrifices in order to sustain their families needs, but not without some consequences that follow.  There is a reason that we are counseled to not work as women.  We are advised to be there to provide" supervision in studying, in working inside and outside the home, in the nurturing that only [mothers] can adequately give—the love, the blessing, the encouragement, and the closeness of a mother" (Hinckley, 1998, p. 97).

There are many consequences that will follow with a mother who is no always able to adequately provide the attention that her children need.  Children constantly seek the attention of the people around them, but it is especially important to them to be recognized by their parents.  "Parental involvement... is one of the most important factors determining how a child performs in school" (Kaminer, 2005, p. 316).  Too often parents, mothers, get too involved in their work and the needs of child are put on the back burner.  Stress carries over from the work place into the home and it causes for unpleasant circumstances.

Even if a mother wants to be there for their child, workplaces don't usually oblige to letting a mom take a day off to be able to care for their children whenever necessary.  Mothers are "often unable to take time off from work to attend meetings with teachers, principals, and other school officials, or to stay at home with their children when they are sick" (Kaminer, 2005, p. 316), making the child's needs, again, be unmet.

In 1986, Jan Underwood Pinborough said, "Family life always demands sacrifice, but working outside the home makes it even more difficult to balance personal needs, marital needs, and family needs."  It is so important to learn to balance the life of our families and our work.  Our children need us and they must be our first priority.

Show them you care.  Show them you love them.  Be a loving mother.

Sources:
Hinckley, Gordon B. (1986, November). Women of the Church. Ensign, 69. Retrieved from http://www.lds.org/

Hinckley, Gordon B. (1998, November). Walking in the Light of the Lord. Ensign, 97. Retrieved from http://www.lds.org/

Kaminer, Debbie N. (2005). The Work-Family Conflict: Developing a Model of Parental Accommodation in the Workplace. American University Law Review. Retrieved from http://www.wcl.american.edu/journal/lawrev/54/kaminer.pdf.

Pinborough, Jan Underwood (1986, March). Working Double-Time: The Working Mother's Dilemma. Ensign. Retrieved from http://www.lds.org/